A Whole Life In Common


“You don’t have to have anything in common with people you’ve known since you were five. With old friends, you’ve got your whole life in common.” Lyle Lovett

For a fleeting moment it was just like 1984.

Together for the first time in 31 years at another beautiful wedding; although thankfully this time we were there just to help with last minute errands instead of me wearing my Maid of Honor dress or him giving the Best Man toast.

The former Best Man and I were there to celebrate not only the marriage of a beautiful young couple but to honor the bride’s parents, our individual allies from childhood, to whom friendship means so much. The people who are the first ones that you call for reassurance when you are angry at life or to laugh with when you have the most incredible story; to cry with when a child is sick or a parent has passed; and with whom you simply must share your 50th birthday drinking champagne straight from a bottle while on a boat.

Like all weddings, we reminisced about the old days together. The guys have their skiing and golfing adventures, Pam and I have a childhood spent carpooling to school, Miss Jackie’s dance classes, and the Swim Club in one of our mother’s vehicles. The days back before anyone became very successful in business, before I met and married the Old Man, and way before any of us thought about children of our own.

In the 30 years since my own wedding to the Old Man, I have learned that marriage celebrations are so much more than a couple starting their family. It’s also publicly identifying the friends who will become your life champions just when you need them the most.

So as the Old Man and I danced alongside our friends at their daughter’s wedding reception I just couldn’t help but feel just how lucky I am to have found people with whom I truly have my whole life in common.

5 thoughts on “A Whole Life In Common

  1. Beautifully written and expressed, Becky. It is such a relief to have friends who you don’t need to ‘splain yourself to. I never had this as a child as my family moved a lot (military families tend to do that) and in adulthood, we moved around too. Now that I’ve settled into VA, my friends here of 20 years qualify as “old” friends, and I cherish them. I love the image of you downing champagne together with your old friends on a boat. Cheers to friends and life in general.

    • Thank you, Barbara! I am fortunate to have found friends in my adopted hometown too whom I feel like I have known and loved forever. And I hope the image of our boat trip is comical because the trip most certainly was…I might let Pookie write about that one and the now infamous “Rogue Wave.”

      • It is comical indeed! My image anyway. OK, I’ll wait for Pookie’s post on the rogue wave. “Rogue” is my husband’s nickname, by the way. Roger turned to Rog which naturally turned to “Rogue.” Why I share this with you is anybody’s guess! Totally not apropos of your lovely post. Sorry!

  2. Walnutandwest

    Beautiful piece! We’ve moved a lot as adults and paid a price in friendships – so we are extra grateful for the longtime early ones! Thanks for the nudge to reflect! -Wendy

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